Step 1: Becoming Aware

STEP 1: BECOMING AWARE is the first step in the process of receiving your life. You are becoming aware of the brilliance, beauty and truth of what you are. You are learning to listen to your inner wisdom. The language of your authentic self is communicating with you and letting you know the degree to which you are sharing or withholding your true self – with or from yourself and the world.


On this Step 1 journey of becoming aware, you begin to recognize the pushes and pulls you are experiencing and what these pushes and pulls are communicating to you. Your pushes and pulls will be unique to you.

You feel yourself being pulled when you are energized, enthusiastic and moving with the current of your life. On the other hand, when you feel yourself pushing against, or resisting, people, situations or thoughts, you are not moving with the current of your life. This pushing against is really pushing against yourself. As you journey through this process you will come to see that where you run into resistance, i.e. experience a push, is the exact moment in time where you feel you have to compromise yourself by being less than or attempting to be more than your true self.

Your pushes and pulls are the barometer of your relationship with yourself, with your energy, and with the flow of life.

These pushes and pulls reveal to you how you are currently flowing your energy. You can feel when you are allowing yourself to be pulled by and into the flow of life and, on the other hand, when you are pushing against and resisting the flow of life. You will want to become highly sensitive to, very aware of, both the pushes and the pulls you are experiencing. With practice, discerning between a push and a pull will become easy for you.

Step 1


To do this exercise, take out your log and select two pages, one right after the other. At the top of one of the pages, write PUSHING AGAINST. At the top of the other page, write BEING PULLED TOWARD.

Record your pushes and pulls at the end of the day, or whenever you have time to reflect on your day. You may want to write down your PUSH/PULLS for a few days or a week until you feel you have enough data to work with. Recording your PUSH/PULLS may even become a valuable lifelong habit. The more PUSH/PULLS you have written down, the more data you will have to work with.

Your Pushes and Pulls Are Your Own Personal Dat

RESISTING THE FLOW IS PUSHING. When you feel yourself resisting something, or when you have the feeling of pushing against, make a note of it. Write this down in your log. You will know this pushing against feeling because this feeling is much like what you would feel if you were trying to swim against a current, against a flow.

You may experience a knot in the pit of your stomach or a tightness in your chest. When you get this feeling, write down what you were doing or thinking about when this feeling came over you. Perhaps someone said something to you, or maybe you were working on a project you disliked, or maybe you felt awkward in a particular social situation.

THE OPPOSITE OF PUSHING IS BEING PULLED TOWARD, GOING WITH THE FLOW. When you feel your energy calling you forth, when you find yourself gravitating toward  something, make a note of this on the page of your log with the heading, BEING PULLED.

The activity you make a note about can be almost anything. This can be a conversation you were engaged in, a request someone made of you, a comment someone made, a call from a client, an interaction with your child, a commercial you saw on television. This can even be something you read on the Internet, or a certain food item you saw when grocery shopping, etc. Nothing is too trivial. Just like the pushes, a pull can be something you were doing or even just a thought you were thinking.  

YOU ARE WRITING DOWN YOUR PUSH/PULLS AS A RESPONSE TO WHAT YOU ARE EXPERIENCING AND FEELING. Did you feel your energy being pulled toward or did you feel your energy pushing against? As you won’t be able to write down all the pushes and pulls you experience throughout any one day, write down the ones that hold the most energy for you, highlight your strongest push and your strongest pull for each day you are recording these.   

Some Examples of Push/Pulls


(resisting the flow)

  1. Hearing my mom call and ask me about the upcoming holiday dinner.
  2. Hearing my husband criticize the outfit I am wearing.
  3. Having to drive my son to baseball practice.
  4. Realizing I forgot to pay the insurance bill.
  5. Receiving the announcement for the class reunion.
  6. Waiting in line to check into my hotel.
  7. Agreeing to meet with my friend for coffee.
  8. Seeing the drip irrigation isn’t working.
  9. When the conversation at the party turned to politics.
  10. Having my supervisor pile more work on my desk.


(going with the flow)

  1. Making dinner tonight while listening to music.
  2. Having a conversation with my friend about our upcoming bike trip.
  3. Looking over the seed catalog that came in the mail.
  4. Making a new dish for my family.
  5. Preparing for my presentation at work.
  6. Clearing out the pantry.
  7. Putting a bid on a new piece of property.
  8. Teaching my physics class.
  9. Going on my morning walk.
  10. Collaborating on a new business project 




List your PUSH/PULLS where you think they best fit. This exercise is about becoming more and more aware of yourself and of your energy. You are simply starting to more carefully develop your self-awareness muscle and to become more familiar with your authentic self.

Remember that in Step 1 there is nothing for you to do with or about your push/pulls.  Do this exercise without judgment. You are just gathering data for further study. You are simply noticing these pushes and pulls, and listing them so you can remember them and use them later.